An exorbitant amount of time has passed this year that I would like to take outside and bury in the yard. That said, this week has seen a marked change in my self-perception and how I approach the world every morning. Rather than dread every sunrise and mechanically getting through each day, I'm feeling the pull of creative endeavours. More than this, family time has become enjoyable again. Although the saying has been overused for decades, there is a light at the end of the tunnel …
… and it's not an oncoming train.
Hopefully this is something that I can maintain for more than a handful of weeks as the seemingly endless cycle of self-inflicted burnout-depression-self-loathing after a couple of months of tossing candles into the fire1 really needs to stop. TO accomplish this, there will no longer be any months of the year where I put in 80 hours of OT at the day job. I'll "selfishly" use some of my personal time after 11:00pm to get in a nice power-walk around the neighbourhood. Heck, the podcatcher will also be allowed to have more than 3 spoken-word podcasts again2.
There is little point racing to burnout and there is little point to investing too much of myself into any project, be it personal or professional. Getting things done is important, but so is enjoying the process.
Some people burn candles at both ends. Not me. I toss the whole thing into the fire as it gets the job done faster.
I had unsubscribed from a lot of conversational shows because hearing people have adult conversations with each other, laughing and learning along the way, really frustrated me. I can imagine that people in solitary confinement do not like hearing other people's conversations after a while.